Blogging 101: Write to Your Dream Reader: Best Friend

Today’s assignment: Write to Your Dream Reader

We often create posts hoping that someone in particular will see (and appreciate) our work. Today, publish a post for that person — whether they’re a real-life figure or not — and stretch your blogging chops as you do.

For my best friend.

You never really know how special someone will be to you when you first meet them. It isn’t like I was out looking for a new best friend. I didn’t really have one for most of my life. In high school, my best friend shared a few similarities to me. Not many, but a few. I was athletic, and she couldn’t jog if her life depended on it. She wasn’t over-weight – not in the slightest – in fact, most people thought she was anorexic. She wasn’t. I saw that girl eat anyone under the table. She was tall and lanky and very uncoordinated. I played basketball, and she was the assistant who kept track of points and scores throughout the games. She was into punk music and I was into country. I liked to dance and she liked to awkwardly sway in the corner. I had a boyfriend and she loved from afar. Neither one of us was a part of the popular crowd – we bonded over mutual dislike for the prissy girls who dismissed us because we didn’t have mommy or daddy’s money to spend on new clothes. Both our parents were divorced. We both enjoyed theater and became close throughout high school because of theater. It brought us together. We could pretend to be whomever we wanted.

As soon as we graduated high school, we went to college: University of Minnesota Twin Cities for her and University of Wisconsin Oshkosh for me. WE lost touch. Rather, she became distant. She met a boy. She stopped having time to chat on the phone – we usually made time every Saturday to catch up and talk about dorm life, but she couldn’t make time for me anymore. He became her life. AND that’s okay to love someone that much that you become infatuated with them. It happens. It’s young love. However, people – especially girls – have a hard time balancing time between friends and significant others.

We always told each other that we would never let distance get in the way of our friendship, and really, it wasn’t the distance. She pushed me away for a guy. We both had many mutual friends who went to the same college, so I decided that I would go visit for the weekend. She said she would be available so I was very excited. My plan wasn’t to stay with her for the two nights, but one of our mutual friends, which was fine. She had more room at her place for guests.

We were all over 21, so we decided to go to a wine bar and have a girls night. There was about eight of us who met up – I only knew four of the girls, but I was very excited to meet some new friends in hopes to visit the city more often. Well, my best friend brought her boyfriend with her, even though everyone said it was a girls night. She barely talked to me all night. She had her own conversations with her boyfriend and ignored everyone else. I made a comment to her about how it was rude that I came all the way up there to see her, and she couldn’t take five minutes out of her time to actually talk to me.

I found out a few weeks later from the mutual friend that I stayed with that she had been talking about me behind my back. She said that I was selfish. She said I don’t know how to be a friend. She told me that none of my problems were ever significant to her – that I was just a complainer.

She knew things about me. Secrets that I had never told anyone else. She took my trust from me that day and I’ve never had a best friend since then. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had some really really awesome and amazing friends. But for me, a best friend is someone that I go to first with everything. Someone I want to share my ups and downs with. Someone that I can trust.

I’ve always been very careful about who I tell my life to. I can be extremely guarded. I’m hard to get to know – that is something I have always been aware of. I don’t like people knowing my secrets.

Fast forward to when I met my current best friend – six years after I lost the first best friend I had:

(Now, to get one thing straight, my boyfriend is my one true best friend, but I’m writing about my platonic best friend. Josh will always trump everyone else when it comes to best friends, but I wanted to write something a little differently.)

I met my best friend through work. He was friends with someone who worked on the same team as me who introduced us. We didn’t talk a lot at first – mostly because we are both extremely guarded people. Our friendship has blossomed over the last two years. Something about us just clicked. Clicked in a totally platonic way. Everyone says how a guy and a girl cannot be best friends – that it just isn’t possible because there will be a sexual attraction. But that wasn’t there for us. We were both dating other people – neither of our significant others like that our best friend was of the opposite sex – but we didn’t let that get into the way of our friendship. I was comfortable around him from the very beginning of our friendship. We gave each ther dating advice, and when we got broken up with, we were there for each other with Irish car bombs and a shoulder to cry on. Although, admittedly, he hasn’t seen me cry yet, but I’ve seen him cry!

He is someone that I can confide in. He will tell me when I’m being a stupid bitch, and I will tell him when he’s being an asshole. I’ve told him things that I have yet to tell any of my girlfriends. He is one of the most caring people I know, even though he won’t admit that to anyone. When we go out together for drinks after work, I’m always on the lookout to see what girls to introduce him to. We love each other. Platonically. No one seems to get that, though, which is slightly annoying. YES it IS possible to have a best friend of the opposite sex. Nothing has or ever will happen between us.

To my best friend:

I love you like a brother. I love that we can laugh over stupid things within work that no one else would understand. I want you to know that you are one of the few people that I have truly trusted in a very long time. All I could ever ask is the best for you. I hope every single day that you have a fantastic day. I couldn’t imagine not having some sort of conversation with you daily: whether it was about the weirdo I saw on the train or how someone on your team is annoying or what guy advice i needed or what girl advice you needed.

You have one thing to work on, though: to be patient. You’ll find that special person you are meant to be with. Don’t rush it. You tend to get discouraged from time to time. But I promise you that you’ll find someone amazing just as I have. I need you to start focusing on life and living it and being happy. I need you to start focusing on the positive things in your life instead of the negatives. You tend to get caught up with things that you have no control over, and I don’t want you to go through life sad. I don’t want you to have stressful days. I don’t want you to be frowning instead of smiling. You have many people around you who love you and care for you. Myself included. Sometimes you are a little oblivious to the people around you who care for you. Don’t worry though, I promise to remind you every time that we get drunk. 🙂

You are my best friend and nothing is ever going to change that. I have faith that you’ll get everything in life that you have ever wanted. Just don’t ever give up. Never ever give up. You might go through trying times and feel like you are at wits end, but whenever times get tough and you need someone to be by your side, you know that I’ll always be there for you. Night or day. Nothing is ever inconvenient when someone is your best friend. And I never want you to forget that.

BFFS for life.


P.S. To this day, one of the best “Open Letters” I have ever read was written by one of my good friends: Lauryn Marie. This is a perfect example of an amazing open letter.


Blogging 101: Say Hello to the Neighbors

Today’s assignment: Today’s assignment: follow five new topics in the Reader and five new blogs.

I currently have one topic that I am following on the reader, which is “Blogging 101.” I chose the following five topics to follow and I picked one blog from each topic – someone that I just followed today, and not someone I’m already following (Just a disclaimer to my current followers!):


i wrote in blood

Broke Beauty Blogger On A Budget

Book Reviews
The Night Owl’s Guide to Reading

Earthen Love

Relationships: everyone has such different perspectives on relationships: what works and what doesn’t work. I wanted to follow this topic to read about how other couples handle obstacles in their lives. Don’t get me wrong, I adore Joshua (my bf) and us two are the only ones who know how to deal with each other, but, as weird as it sounds, I like reading about this stuff. And not even in the sense of I’m looking for advice, but fresh perspectives are the best to read.

Inspiration: we all need a little pick me up from time to time, so why not look to the inspirational blogs? I love reading inspirational quotes and stories online.

Beauty: I feel like I am a terrible female most of the time. Like, I don’t know many things about beauty. At all. I have a few friends who works in that industry that I’m constantly asking questions to. I’m almost 29 and I cannot curl my hair. I own two make up brushes (given to me by a friend) but I cannot ever remember how to use them. I only wear mascara and eye liner… Maybe. Frankly, I don’t particularly like how foundation feels on my face, so I never wear it. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll dress up from time to time and look presentable (well at least Josh thinks I am), but I don’t purchase a lot of beauty products. I don’t know what good quality for my skin – I’m extremely picky about what goes on my face. I stopped using any kind of harsh medications, soaps and lotions about three years ago and my skin has never looked better. Also, I don’t like spending a ton of money on things I rarely use. I’m hoping to find some “lazy cheap” tricks.

Book Reviews: I love reading. I am an English major after all. My dream house WILL have a library. No question about that. So what better way to find good books than by finding blogs who post book reviews?? why didn’t I think of this before??

Cooking: I might love reading, but I love cooking even more. I’ll manage to burn toast or a frozen pizza somehow, but give me a complicated twelve page recipe and I’m good to go! I love the challenge of cooking difficult meals – they are always the best, though! And they are definitely the most rewarding.

Blogging 101: Introduce Yourself

I know that I have been blogging for a while, but I feel like I’ve lost some focus on what my blog is and where I want to go with it. I wanted to join Blogging 101 a few months back, but, as usual, I missed the deadline.

Well not this time around! And January seems like the time for resolutions and following through, so I decided to enroll! Our first assignment is to introduce ourselves (yes, I’m a little late, but I signed up yesterday the 5th, and the first assignment was posted on the 4th – oops):

I do have an “about me” section, but it’s fairly generic. I’ve been writing since I was a youngster in grade school. I always kept them private, though. I never wanted anyone to see my writing – mostly in fear of rejection. I remember one time when I was in 6th grade, we had to write a Halloween story for class. I turned mine in and I got an A on it. I was so proud. The next day, my teacher asked the students who would like to volunteer to read their stories. The popular outgoing students all raised their hands and wanted to show off their stories. I did not. I didn’t like to be put in the spotlight. After about five students read their stories, no one else volunteered to read, so my teacher called on me to read mine. I was terrified! I stumbled on my words. My OWN words. A few students laughed at me. My own classmates thought laughing at me would be appropriate. So, I stopped reading, sat back down at my desk and I didn’t finish my story. That kept me from wanting to share my writing for a very long time. It seems silly now – to let other people’s reactions dictate MY actions. I shouldn’t have let it bother me so much, but I did. After all, I was only in 6th grade.

I didn’t have a lot of friends, so I turned to writing stories – mostly based on people that I knew. Writing about what you know is easier, especially to a grade schooler. It wasn’t until high-school that I shared a few poems that I read, but only with a few friends. And DEFINITELY not online. I did start an online journal once. Anyone remember Livejournal?? The majority of my entries were set to private, but I would post things like “I ate a grilled cheese sandwich and watched a movie today.” Nothing of substance at all.

I started this blog in 2011, but never really wrote anything in it for a while. I would post quotes or inspiration sayings very rarely for the first year. It wasn’t until I discovered heartache and wine that I published my first poem, “Back to September” and, admittedly, I was not sober. I received such positive feedback about my writing style and letting my emotions public, that I got the courage to write a few more poems. All of them about boys (go figure, right?) and all because of heartaches.

I could never quote commit to blogging, though. I started many posts, but I never published them. “Do people actually read this stuff?” was (and still is) a thought that crosses my mind. I think most of it is out of fear: fear of rejection, fear of sounding stupid, or fear of being too public about my life.

My hope with doing these Blogging 101 courses is to find some focus for my blog, but also to connect with other writers/bloggers. I am a Metra commuter (just over an hour each way to work) so I very much so enjoy reading blogs and building online support groups. Hopefully this will help me learn to let it go.

//cue Elsa//

Until next time.

Blogging 101: Introduce Yourself link.